Sunday Funnies: LOL, March 24, 2013

Cidu Bill on Mar 24th 2013

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Lola:

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Filed in Adam Huber, Bill Bickel, Bug Martini, Comics That Made Us Laugh Out Loud, Dark Side of the Horse, Frazz, New Yorker, Pearls Before Swine, Stephan Pastis, comics, humor, lol | 41 responses so far

41 Responses to “Sunday Funnies: LOL, March 24, 2013”

  1. Proginoskes Mar 24th 2013 at 04:16 am 1

    Gandhi appeared in the next day’s PBS, but not any more. Pastis should have said “A STRIP” …

    Speaking of strips, the one above was a CIDU for me, until I realized that only the front of the house was built, so only the front of the woman was clothed. (It looks like the beginning of a ****.)

  2. Proginoskes Mar 24th 2013 at 04:16 am 2

    The cookie thing is a *five* second rule.

    And I guess the word **** gets censored on this website.

  3. farmer Mar 24th 2013 at 08:18 am 3

    That’s an awfully sharp ax Horace has got there.

    The Bug doesn’t tickle me much, but the rest are great.

  4. Detcord Mar 24th 2013 at 08:19 am 4

    In our house there wasn’t a 3-second rule or a 5-second rule. Our dog had a rule that anything edible that hit the floor was legally his.

  5. Kilby Mar 24th 2013 at 08:22 am 5

    I agree with Proginoskes (@2) on the duration for the kitchen rule, but the basketball rule is definitely three seconds. Mallett had to bend one or the other to make the joke fit together, and the kitchen rule (being unwritten) was clearly safer to edit.

    P.S. My first exposure to the five-second rule was having it explained to me by my brother, who was a waiter in an Italian restaurant at the time. I never went to eat there, neither then, nor thereafter.

  6. mitch4 Mar 24th 2013 at 08:23 am 6

    [Please overlook my ignorance, but..] Is there a 3-second rule in basketball? Or a N-second rule, with a different N?

  7. Terry Mar 24th 2013 at 08:37 am 7

    An offensive player may remain in the paint (the key) for only three seconds. Violation results in a turnover. It seems to me to be rarely called these days as the game moves so fast; but in those long ago days of my youth it was called several times each game.

  8. chuckers Mar 24th 2013 at 08:43 am 8

    I call geezer on “Bug”. I am only calling geezer on it because a few months ago when I mentioned “Steve Austin” the kid behind the counter said he only hear of the wrestler by that name.

  9. Powers Mar 24th 2013 at 08:56 am 9

    Chuckers: But would the kid recognize “The Six Million Dollar Man”?

  10. mitch4 Mar 24th 2013 at 08:57 am 10

    It’s also somewhat geezerish (or just nostalgic) to recall the days when six million dollars could sound like a big, expensive government research program.

  11. Elyrest Mar 24th 2013 at 09:29 am 11

    I’m a geezer and I didn’t recognize “The Six Million Dollar Man” a part of the joke. I knew it was poking at something, but didn’t know what. I never watched the show and although the name Steve Austin was vaguely familiar I couldn’t put it with anything. I usually like Bug,but I just sort of skipped over this one when I read it.

  12. John Small Berries Mar 24th 2013 at 10:19 am 12

    @mitch (#10): Heck, the way it’s been going, in another few decades, six million dollars will just be the average cost of a hospital stay.

  13. chuckers Mar 24th 2013 at 10:21 am 13

    @Powers

    Nope, he didn’t. Neither did the woman that was working with him behind the counter. The Bionic Man was only vaguely familiar to them.

  14. Morris Keesan Mar 24th 2013 at 10:34 am 14

    Once, when we had a pair of Japanese exchange students in our home for dinner, I tried to explain the 5-second rule to them, and one of them said, “In Japan, it’s a 10-second rule,” and the other one agreed with her. This made sense to me.
    So it doesn’t seem totally outside the bounds of credibility that wherever Frazz lives (northern midwest US, ne?), the food-on-the-floor rule is a 3-second rule.

    There was a Woot! T-shirt on this theme, a while back, with an illustration of a piece of food on a wooden floor, and some germs waiting in the corner with a stopwatch. It may be back in print.

  15. Dave Van Domelen Mar 24th 2013 at 11:18 am 15

    Some biologists researched the five second rule a while back. In short, any dry food (hitting a dry but dirty floor) will have to be on the floor for hours to pick up any significant contamination, while moist food is scummed up in microseconds. So I’ve replaced the five second rule with the dry food rule.

  16. jrpstonecarver Mar 24th 2013 at 12:16 pm 16

    And here I was thinking about a totally different 3 second rule… the one that defines a safe distance between moving vehicles on the road.

    I wonder how many other 3 second rules there are?

  17. zookeeper Mar 24th 2013 at 12:53 pm 17

    Not to change the course of the discussion, but the stage-set gag was great.
    And, yes, it took me a while to dig up the reference to “round up the cost and make it his name.”

  18. Jeff S. Mar 24th 2013 at 01:06 pm 18

    “What, like more polite?”

    Cracks me up! LOL!

  19. James Pollock Mar 24th 2013 at 01:13 pm 19

    One of the networks tried a “Bionic Woman” reboot a couple of years ago.

    According to IMDB, Lee Majors is “Best Known” for Fall Guy, then Six Million Dollar Man.

    More recently, he appeared on Raising Hope as Burt’s dad, making him a great-grandfather(!) on that show.

  20. Morris Keesan Mar 24th 2013 at 01:19 pm 20

    It occurs to me that the third one, being obviously a New Yorker cartoon, gets an interestingly-different interpretation of the all-purpose caption.

  21. James Schend Mar 24th 2013 at 02:34 pm 21

    Took me a minute to get the movie set one. False fronts! Haha.

  22. turquoisecow Mar 24th 2013 at 03:12 pm 22

    I’ve heard the X second rule (with regards to food) with variations as two, five, or even ten seconds. I suspect it might depend on the person speaking how long the rule lasts. Three is not a number I usually hear, but if a kid asked, “what’s the three second rule?” I’d probably answer the same way as Frazz, and not even think of basketball. Unless we were in some other basketball-related-scenario, like there was a game on television or we were near a basketball game.

    I wonder if some people saw the New Yorker cartoon and were like, “Yeah, and?” because they assumed it was the beginning of a particular sort of movie.

  23. Cidu Bill Mar 24th 2013 at 08:15 pm 23

    That’s weird, Proginoskes, because as far as I know no word gets translated to “***” on this site: some words trigger moderation, which I’m sure really sucks at times, but “****” isn’t any option I’ve come across.

  24. The Vicar Mar 24th 2013 at 08:35 pm 24

    The “Bug” strip missed a good opportunity for some snark — instead of “what, like more polite”, it should have used “better at test flying? Good idea, those planes are expensive.”

  25. David Mar 24th 2013 at 09:38 pm 25

    I’ve found myself wondering if the 6 million dollar man was geezer material. I’ve been seeing it referenced in advertising and wondered if the market was geezers or if it had made a resurgence I didn’t know about making the ad be for a younger market.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kbiE-IYiQtk

    The Zac Brown Band video for “The Wind” also references “we can rebuild him.”

  26. chemgal Mar 25th 2013 at 12:59 am 26

    My preschooler knows who Steve Austin is. But he’s been watching DVDs with his dad.

  27. guero Mar 25th 2013 at 01:24 am 27

    I’m in agreement with Mitch4 @10 and John Small Berries @12, but somewhere along the way things have gotten seriously out of whack. Not only would kids today be unimpressed by a $6,000,000 man, but even accounting for inflation, in terms of an expensive government project, the $30,000,000 man doesn’t sound all that impressive, either. Of course, that could just be a government thing. If you adjust for inflation, the top prize from The $64,000 Question (as he slyly burnishes his geezer cred) is only a little over $500,000, which is pretty much in the ball park for the big money game shows today. ($500,000; $1,000,000; close enough for jazz.)

  28. minorannoyance Mar 25th 2013 at 01:56 am 28

    Memories of the Austin Powers movie — the funny one — where the villain is hard pressed to come up with anything satisfyingly evil. Even holding the world hostage for one million dollars gets laughed at.

  29. Todd Mar 25th 2013 at 03:47 am 29

    I didn’t understand the point of keeping the Bionic Woman’s name when everything else was different. Instead of a teacher, she was a bartender. She was nearly killed in a car wreck rather than a sky diving accident. She was pregnant and lost the baby in the accident. And, since the supporting characters were from “Cyborg”, which they couldn’t get the rights to, they had to create an entirely different supporting cast. They should have used the name of the character from the reunion movie (the bionic girl was played by Sandra Bullock).

    Wonder if anyone sells a dress like that.

  30. Ledasmom Mar 25th 2013 at 07:48 am 30

    Third one’s not only a New Yorker cartoon but, unless my memory is playing more tricks on me than usual, rather an old New Yorker cartoon. I note that it has held its humor particularly well.

  31. Narmitaj Mar 25th 2013 at 09:04 am 31

    From the style of the people - clothes, hair, pipe-smoking, hats - the movie-set cartoon it looks like late the 1950s or maybe late 40s/early 60s.

  32. Molly J Mar 25th 2013 at 09:35 am 32

    @Morris - your comment about the standard New Yorker caption gave me a bigger chuckle than any of the comics.

  33. Ian Osmond Mar 25th 2013 at 09:48 am 33

    Mitch4 @ 10: yeah, DARPA routinely spends much more than $6M developing new prosthetic technologies for wounded veterans. (As well they should.)

  34. Kilby Mar 25th 2013 at 10:29 am 34

    @ Molly J (32) - Thank you! It took me a while to recall which caption Morris Keesan was referring to (@20), but when I remembered the line, it improved the cartoon immensely. I know we’re not supposed to engage in sweeping negative generalizations, but this was definitely an “exceptional gem that proves the rule”.

  35. DPWally Mar 25th 2013 at 12:01 pm 35

    In the New Yorker cartoon I believe that’s her puffy left sleeve, not one of her false fronts. (Great description, though!)

    What’s the universal caption?

  36. DPWally Mar 25th 2013 at 12:03 pm 36

    A friend proposed “5 second rule” to a priest who dropped a communion wafer. The priest was not amused.

  37. Bob Mar 25th 2013 at 01:10 pm 37

    @DPWally (36) - funny!

    Over the years, basketball has had (or may still have in some versions), the 10-second rule, the 5-second rule, and the 3-second rule. Use of the 24-second (or other limit) clock has eliminated (I think) the 10-second rule for getting the ball beyond midcourt; 5-second rule results (used to result?) in a jump ball; 3-second rule is a turnover, as previously noted by Terry.

  38. Kilby Mar 25th 2013 at 03:08 pm 38

    @ 36 & 37 - Years ago a priest told me that there was an official “canonical” procedure for remedying such occurrences, but I cannot remember ever seeing it take place. However, I do remember that at my own first communion, one little girl (at the other end of the rail from me, so I never figured out who it was) did not drop her wafer, she (doubtless because of stress and excitement) vomited it back up. There was an exceptional flurry of activity (from priests, alter boys, and several other adults), but I sincerely doubt that anyone among them was worrying about saying the correct prayers over that spot of carpet.

    P.S. @ DPWally (35) - Luckily, I don’t have to annoy anyone by quoting the caption here, instead, I can send you to Bill’s own commentary on the subject.

  39. Elyrest Mar 25th 2013 at 04:23 pm 39

    Thanks, Kilby. I wasn’t sure what the universal caption was either, but remembered it when I clicked on your link. It does give an added fillip to the comic.

  40. Treesong Mar 26th 2013 at 06:36 pm 40

    To quote that unimpeachable resource, urbandictionary.com:

    May 5, 2007 Urban Word of the Day
    An unwritten law dictating that if a food or other consumable item is dropped onto the floor, it may be picked up up and eaten within five seconds. The reasoning behind this is that dirt and germs take six seconds to transfer from one surface to another.
    “Oops, dropped my popsicle. Five second rule!”
    (Proceeds to pick up dirty-ass rocket pop and suck the lint off of it)

  41. Meryl A Mar 28th 2013 at 02:15 am 41

    We get these 3 new channels that run old shows and are owned by local network stations. On one of them, I forget which the Bionic Woman is in reruns (Antenna TV, This, and Cozy). One also has I Spy and right now, at 2:30 am, we are watching Jack Benny, after watching Burns and Allen on Antenna.

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