Relativity
Cidu Bill on Mar 16th 2010
Last night, the cashier at Fuddrucker’s took it upon herself to give me — several years prematurely — a senior citizen discount. I realized it made sense in a way: she seemed to be about 12 years old, and I guess the younger you are, the more likely you are to overestimate the age of somebody who’s a few decades older.
But later on it occurred to me… isn’t it equally true that the older you get, the more likely you are to think that the Fuddrucker’s cashier looks like a 12-year-old?
Filed in Bill Bickel | 35 responses so far
Matthew Mar 16th 2010 at 12:05 pm 1
Yes, Bill, it is true, which is the reason that I must increasingly remind myself to refer to college students as “men” & “women”, not “boys” & “girls”.
chemgal Mar 16th 2010 at 12:22 pm 2
Yup. The cashier at the grocery store was so young the other day that my husband asked me if the cashier had been standing on a box! A sure sign that we are approching geezer-hood. (And I’m not even 40!)
Keera Mar 16th 2010 at 12:47 pm 3
Reminds me of a trip to the local ER with my grandma, who at the time was pushing 90 (and I was 50 years younger): The young brunette doctor had just finished talking to Grandma and had left the room. Grandma then said to me, “I know I’m getting old; she looked only 25!” “I’m getting old, as well,” I replied. “She looked 25 to me, too.”
Elyrest Mar 16th 2010 at 12:58 pm 4
I definitely think that age plays into perception. I remember when I was 15 and thinking how cute certain 15 year old boys were. By the time a was in college they looked like kids and now they look gawky and somehow unformed. When I was in my 20’s I thought guys in their 20’s were adorable. Now they look like teenagers and I wonder what they will look like when they grow up.
Matthew Mar 16th 2010 at 01:02 pm 5
Keera, the doctor might have been 25, an intern in the e.r. My regular family practice doctor, however, still looks like a kid, but I remind myself of my age (50) & that he listens to me & sounds like a reasonable man–that’s what counts.
Its Justme Mar 16th 2010 at 01:10 pm 6
What bothers me is the “experts” doing various news analyses. Mostly I’m successful in repressing the urge to yell “Why you whippersnapper, what do you know!”
nonegiven Mar 16th 2010 at 01:21 pm 7
I’m 53 and last year I found out you only have to be 50 to sign up for ‘Senority checking’ at my bank. I’m getting a lot of junk mail from AARP lately, too.
src666 Mar 16th 2010 at 01:43 pm 8
I think AARP has started recruiting people as soon as they get a driver’s license, anymore. Anything to increase their headcount.
David N Mar 16th 2010 at 02:38 pm 9
I hear you src666. I’ve been getting stuff from AARP for over a year, and I’m 5 years shy of eligibility. Just as Bill found out above, most people aren’t too thrilled to find out they’re in “the club” - and certainly don’t want to be invited earlier.
ty Mar 16th 2010 at 02:54 pm 10
Only when I see people I haven’t seen in years or decades do I feel the march of time. They look so old!
Rasheed Mar 16th 2010 at 04:07 pm 11
I get AARP mail and I’m 31! I remember when I was 10-11, at camp, the councilors were all 19 or younger, but my brain then, and memory now, place them all between 25-30. Then again, my wife is one year older than my sister, but they don’t look like the same age bracket at all. When I introduced her to the family two years ago, everyone was shocked she was only 19 at the time!
smokinq72 Mar 16th 2010 at 04:10 pm 12
Hey don’t complain Bill. Take the discount and smile. My wife and I have been getting a senior discount at some places since we turned 40. Well maybe I do look that old. It could be that I have lost all the hair and walk slowly (bad knees).
Enjoy that discount, you may have older cashiers not even offer it to you when you do reach “that age”.
Cidu Bill Mar 16th 2010 at 04:21 pm 13
smokinq72, I have no problem accepting the discount. I got my first discount, at a movie theatre, four years ago (from a 12-year-old behind the ticket counter) — of course the movie was Hollywoodland, and the average audience member was about 60 (no joke), so I think she was probably just giving the discount to everybody.
Chuck Mar 16th 2010 at 05:44 pm 14
Matthew, today was my last day of college. We don’t call each other men and women. We call each other guys/boys and girls.
Sal Mar 16th 2010 at 06:46 pm 15
Bill, I am an old fart,59, and I recently went to the doctors office for a checkup, The young lady who took my blood pressure and drew a blood sample, looked to be about 13. She was the most professional nurse I have ever had draw blood from me. My wife was in the examining room and watched with amusement when I asked the young lady if she was old ejough to drive. Turns out she was 21. So I know how you feel.
CaroZ Mar 16th 2010 at 06:51 pm 16
I thought it was just because I was aging that college and high-school students were looking younger and younger. But then I had the misfortune of opening my high school yearbook from the mid ’80s recently and I thought all the kids looked much older than current high-schoolers do! I think when people are between, say, 20 and 35, they don’t change so fast physically so our perception of age is largely determined by how they dress and act — and so given changing fashions and trends we peg people by generation more than by their current age.
Or maybe kids really are graduating from high school at 14 these days?
amo Mar 16th 2010 at 07:50 pm 17
My husband is 24 and he received AARP mail this year. I think they send it out randomly and hope they get the right person at some point.
Charlene Mar 16th 2010 at 08:43 pm 18
The kids in a 1981 yearbook actually *do* look older than the kids in a 2009 yearbook. It could be that sun exposure in early childhood is the cause. Most of us spent countless hours outdoors without any sun protection, unlike kids nowadays who get sunscreen slathered on them.
Unfortunately, the media have led many to believe that cancer is the only negative side effect of excessive sun exposure, which has created a backlash among those who think any warning is hysterical overreaction by pearl-clutching scaremongers. But premature skin ageing is by far the most likely side effect of too much unprotected sun exposure - it’s universal and unavoidable for anyone with light or medium skin tones.
I’m not convinced that tobacco smoke is that much of an influence, but let’s face it: most of us in our 40s grew up marinated in our parents’ cigarette smoke, and exposure to nicotine is the number one cause of skin ageing. But I doubt that it would have as early an effect as sun exposure, which is known to affect the skin relatively quickly.
George P Mar 16th 2010 at 08:46 pm 19
I honestly can’t tell the difference between 15 and 25 any more. They all look too young to drive.
My big “I’m old now” moment came when I had to do some work at a Catholic school and was standing in the hall when classes changed. Suddenly I was surrounded by high school girls in Catholic school uniforms … and they all looked like children.
JFS Mar 16th 2010 at 09:09 pm 20
At work, I’m stuck in the middle: a lot of folks in their 50s and a bunch of recent and imminent retirements and a a lot of kids right out of college! When I talk with my team mates about “the older I get”, one especially gives me good natured grief about being not that old. And I’ve decided/declared that anyone around there who is more than 10 years younger is a “kid.”
Most of them really do act like kids when they start, too!
Chuck Mar 17th 2010 at 12:04 am 21
Sal, at least in California you can’t get a work permit until 15 1/2, which is the same age you can get a driver’s permit, so….
Mark in Boston Mar 17th 2010 at 12:05 am 22
Tommy on Car Talk told a story about a man who was getting on in years. He changed dentists, and at his first appointment he noticed that the Dentist had not only his medical diploma on the wall but his high school diploma as well, and it was not only the same high school our hero went to but they both graduated in the same year. It was a big high school and the dentist’s name didn’t sound familiar.
The man pointed it out to the dentist and said, “You were in my class!” The dentist said, “Was I? What subject did you teach?”
Mark in Boston Mar 17th 2010 at 12:09 am 23
For myself, I’m more likely to do what Emo Phillips did. He saw someone who looked familiar, and suddenly realized it was little Jimmy Smith, his best friend in first grade! So he ran up and said “Jimmy Smith! How are you doing!” and gave him a hearty slap on the back … and the kid started crying … and Emo realized, if that was Jimmy Smith from first grade, he’d be all grown up now ….
The Bad Seed Mar 17th 2010 at 06:07 am 24
I still remember how old my brother and his friends seemed at his surprise 30th-birthday party, when I was 17. And it just occurred to me that that party was 30 years ago this week! YIKES!
Morris Keesan Mar 17th 2010 at 09:10 am 25
About 15 years ago, we were having a discussion like this at work (where, in my early 40s, I was the oldest person in the company). My boss related this conversation with his mother: “You know you’re getting old when you start noticing how young the policemen look.” “No, you know you’re getting old when your son starts noticing how young the policemen look.”
My son got one AARP recruitment letter when he was 8 years old.
Elyrest #4: I remember, when I was 15, noticing how cute most of the 15-year-old girls were. Now, in my 50s, I still notice how cute the 15-year-old girls are, but I have to remind myself that it’s inappropriate for me to be noticing.
Dave in Tech Support Mar 17th 2010 at 11:54 am 26
I’m still trying to figure out how a movie theatre can charge ‘adult’ admission to anyone over the age of 12, yet require an ‘adult’ to accompany anyone under the age of 17 to an ‘R’ rated film…
Just sayin’…
Elyrest Mar 17th 2010 at 11:57 am 27
Morris Keenan (25) - Some 15 year old girls could pass for women in their mid-twenties. It’s hard to know what’s inappropriate when girls try to look much older and women try to look much younger.
Matthew Mar 17th 2010 at 12:05 pm 28
Morris, it’s perfectly fine to notice. To act upon the noticing, however, in anything more than an avunculur fashion would be ill-advised.
Rainey Mar 17th 2010 at 12:36 pm 29
Because I age much slower than most people, I get treated like I’m still a teenager. ( This is rarely good. ) One night, a customer at the store I work at gave me a hard time and threatened me with violence because I looked in his direction to answer a question he asked about where the orange juice was. ( And he accused me of having an attitude problem. ) He glared at me and said “How old are you?” I replied “28″. A look of surprise flashed accross his face and not wanting to lose face he said “Change your attitude.” and walked to the door. I said “Examine your prey before you jump on it.” Another time a man was holding a promotion for windows for home owners. I walked in his direction and he was getting ready to tell about the promotion but he said “Oh, this won’t help you. You need to be 21.” I replied “Damn, you should have gotten me 11 years ago.” I still get carded when I enter bars ( at the age of 34 ) and I love seeing the looks on people’s faces when they find out how old I actually am.
jjmcgaffey Mar 17th 2010 at 05:04 pm 30
Whereas I started getting gray hair when I was 15, and have constantly been assumed to be older than I am (I was asked how I planned to vote (at a political rally) when I was 16). I really don’t mind, either way - it’s amusing to fool the carnies, though (the guess-your-weight-and-age booths).
Mark in Boston Mar 17th 2010 at 06:34 pm 31
You know, this whole discussion is the premise of “Pluggers”. I guess we have to stop making fun of Pluggers now.
You’re a Plugger if you go out for dinner with your grandson and they give him the senior discount.
You’re a Plugger if you remember when Methuselah was a little kid and people said things like “That puppy is younger than Methuselah.”
Chuck Mar 17th 2010 at 08:15 pm 32
Morris Keesan, my mom got pulled over once when I was 18 and I commented to her afterwards that the officer looked really young. I referred to him as “Officer Junior” which was not very nice, but what am I going to do about it now?
As for being mistaken for a teenager, I was looking at the drink menu at a restaurant (just to look at it, since I don’t actually drink) and the waiter said “oh, that’s not for you.” I don’t think I got offered the kid’s menu that time, but it happens. Hey, did you notice my college sweater? It’s from the college that I actually go to! I went to brunch for my anniversary and there was a live band, so I requested Blue Skies by Irving Berlin. The guy laughed and said I was too young to know that song, and asked me if I was requesting it for my mother. I also got yelled at at a wine store, but the worst incident was when I went to vote for the last presidential election. I walked up to the poll attendant, who looked younger than me, so was probably around my age and she said “do you want a sticker?” “No. I want to vote.” “Oh. Sorry.”
Kathleen Mar 18th 2010 at 06:19 pm 33
You have to be 15 or so to sit in an exit row on an airplane. When I was 26, a flight attendant told me that I would have to change seats, since kids couldn’t sit there.
Now I’m 40. And I think I look it. *sigh*
lettucefactory Mar 19th 2010 at 01:23 pm 34
It’s hard to know what’s inappropriate when girls try to look much older and women try to look much younger.
This is a huge problem, that our culture strains and shouts for “young” as an ideal for everyone to reach for. Not just in the sense that a person might have inappropriate thoughts about a teenager, either. When we start to believe that we’re “old” in the prime of our lives, and that “old” is by definition bad, we resign ourselves to a lot of years of self-loathing.
I’m 31 and honestly, I have no idea how to dress myself, because everything in the store is either made for a teenager or my grandmother. It’s like adulthood doesn’t even exist anymore. You go from young to dust.
casey Mar 21st 2010 at 12:10 am 35
don’t you have to be at least 14 to look for a job, and not younger then that?