When I was studying calculus I dreamed I got “differentiated”, whatever
that meant.

Best. Movie. Evar!

I was in my room, contemplating life and death, when an elf came in and offered to show me the afterlife. He lead my sister and I through a tiny door which, somehow, accomodated our entire bodies. I saw a colorful afterlife, but I remember little about it. Was my food, somehow, spiked with slow-acting D.M.T?

I was a doctor in a hospital, who wanted to pick up his things and go home, but, when I tried to do so, time, abruptly, slowed–until the scene shifted from a relatively sane environment to something, presumably, resembling a bad acid trip. I was, now, Todd from the show Scrubs. Janitor had drugged him with anesthetic–something, admittedly, in character–and appeared, causing horrifying fear, surrounded by swirling psychedelic colors, telling him that he was about to play a video that would be utterly horrifying. A jumble of random images appeared, then, a still image of a woman–in the style of one of Fallout’s 1950s billboards–beautifully singing two words, again and again, accompanied by whooshing wind, becoming ever more horrifying. I, finally, left the scene and saw an outside view of myself, partially covered in light, feeling repeated pokes, even more scared.

This dream requires some context: I, often, work out, and, when I do, I hydrate myself with diet soda. I used to use caffeinated drinks, but, now, I use decaf. This happened while I was, still, addicted to caffeine. I worked out, but, instead of using caffeine, I used black acid. I knew that the components could cause bad trips, psychosis, heart attacks, paranoia and a lot of other bad shit–but, still, I was compelled to use them. I was working out on exercise machines, watching both television, and hallucinations similar to the flashbacks in Flatliners. Everyone told me to quit, yet the cravings could not be resisted. I think that was my unconscious’s way of telling me that I used far too much caffeine.

I have had many dreams where everything seemed perfectly normal, just, like reality, then, I found something slightly amiss, causing absolute terror.

I was standing near my basement, when, suddenly, everything went dark. I had been blinded by a being called Blind. I saw massive protests and political demands occur, demanding my sight be restored, until, finally, everything returned to normal, and I found myself standing in the same spot.

Everyone was fucked, because the universe was ending, collapsing on itself, and, though newsmen discussed it and scientists tried to find a solution, nothing could be done to stop it. I became increasingly desperate, until, finally, the oncoming darkness trapped me in my room. I ended up grasping the last few inches of my desk, the last thing in the universe, staring at my window into nothingness. I noticed something odd about the window, wiped it with my hand, and uncovered a brick wall. I, somehow, passed through, and into a park, where guys were sitting on benches and the Grim Reaper was standing.

I was in my room, everything seemed normal–until I looked in the mirror and saw that I was floating, with my legs tucked under me, like the characters in Landstalker. I realized that I was my soul, then, floated upwards, above the earth, galaxies and across the universe.

Interesting note regarding the last two dreams: A week or so ago, well after having them, I learned that the universe was expanding faster than the speed of light. I do not, normally, believe in aliens, God or the afterlife–but Relativity and Quantum Physics say that perception defines, and creates reality. We cannot perceive things faster than the speed of light, therefore–if modern science and Renee Descartes are correct–there must be some existence beyond our side of the universe. Perhaps, those last two dreams were my mind’s ways of saying, “don’t worry about death–there is an afterlife beyond the universe you can see?” I must contemplate this issue, since it shakes my partial Nihilism to its very core.